Do we know what Beyoncé and JAY-Z named their twins? No — though Sir and Rumi are the hot favourites, based on some reported legal filings. Do we trust that they haven't saddled their kids with monikers like Emphysema and Gonorrhoea? Yes.
Last night Jimmy Kimmel — who, incidentally, is father to Katherine, Kevin, Jane, and William — took the opportunity to mock both the public's ignorance of pop culture and the celebrity custom of bestowing unconventional names upon their brood by getting passersby to offer well wishes to the superstar couple and their new arrivals.
The twist? Each person was given a ridiculous set of names for the Carter twins. Landline and Retweet. Cucumber and Uvula. Bebop and Rocksteady (whom you might remember from the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles cartoon). Denver and Omelette. Zumba and Zika. Pantene and Neosporin (Neo for short). Bedbath and Beyondcé. Bong and Blunt. Coco Loco and Hydraulics. Megatron and Gluten. Emphysema and Kevin. Gonorrhea and Amoxicillin (Moxie for short).
This is the same crowd that thought Rob Kardashian was Donald Trump's Supreme Court pick, but it's still pretty shocking that, save one or two exceptions, there was nary a raised eyebrow or furrowed brow. Some participants even praised the names as "adorable," "beautiful," and "unique." What does that say about us? More importantly, what does that say about Beyoncé and JAY-Z? Seriously: Kevin?
Fingers crossed that this prompts Blue Ivy's mom and dad to release the actual names for their Gemini twins. Or maybe not, given the ribbing Kimmel gave Rumi and Sir. Rude.
Watch the public get pranked below, and tell us: What would you go for?