The Age When You're "Too Old" To Go Clubbing Has Been Revealed (And We're Calling BS)

Illustration: Assa Ariyoshi
It's no secret that we live in an ageist society. In fact, there's evidence everywhere you look: from the obsession with youth and our eternal quest for "wrinkle-free" skin, to being told that women over a certain age should put away their mini-skirts/over-the-knee boots/crop tops (delete as appropriate). There's even an expectation that at some point we'll have to put away our dancing shoes and dial down our social lives because that's what everyone expects of us.
Now, a new piece of research claims to have settled on an answer to the question of age and clubbing: when exactly is one "too old" to go to nightclubs? Well, according to the survey by Currys PC World, it's even younger than you might have thought. Most of the 5,000 people surveyed felt it was "tragic" to still be going clubbing at 37 years old, Metro reported.
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It's unclear how old the survey participants were, making it difficult to draw too many conclusions, but anyone who thinks it's "tragic" for people in their 40s and 50s (and the rest) to spend the odd evening drinking and dancing with their mates and/or other halves needs to focus on themselves and stop caring about social expectations.
Among the excuses deployed for shunning nightclubs were the financial expense, having to get dressed up, arranging babysitters and booking taxis, while nearly three quarters (70%) said they were glad they'd met "the one" because it meant they could enjoy cosy nights in and no longer had to go out on the prowl. (Have they not heard of Tinder?)
While it's apparently sad to be clubbing and going out at 37, it's perfectly acceptable to stay home and stalk people on Facebook, the respondents suggested, with 14% saying they enjoyed the depressing activity.
Nearly three in 10 (29%) said they couldn't face hangovers the next day and a colossal 80% said they were glad to be sat on the sofa when they see friends posting pictures of their nights out on social media.
The research also found that 31 is the age when most people start preferring staying in over going out, while nearly half said they prefer spending a night in front of the TV to going out, regardless of the weather.
And while we are certainly not averse to a relaxing evening in front of Netflix, we say if you feel like going out dancing, then go for it. Whatever age you happen to be.
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